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Become a Better Storyteller with Chief Story Enabler, Keith Bailey
Jenn DeWall:
Hi everyone. It’s Jenn DeWall here, and on this week’s episode of The Leadership Habit, we are going to be sharing with you tips to tell better stories. I sat down with Keith Bailey, who has a passion for it was had a passion for public speaking since experiencing a seminal moment in the fourth grade. From the hospitality industry to global corporate sales, you learn the power of storytelling for profit, influence, and of course, fun! Sixteen years as a personal and corporate coach, Keith is motivated by the success of others in his quest to help you live a life well-spoken, knowing that speakers are created and not born. Keith started Articulated Intelligence to help prevent unintentional audience abuse through a proprietary gamified storytelling technique called “With One Word”. I hope you enjoy our conversation. You’re going to be hearing us play Lifetime One-Word, and I hope that you walk away with tips to tell better stories.
Meet Keith Bailey, Chief Story Enabler
Jenn DeWall:
Hi everyone. It is Jenn DeWall. And in this week’s episode of The Leadership Habit podcast, I am sitting down with chief storyteller, enabler, Chief Story Enabler, Mr. Keith Bailey, Keith. Welcome. Oh, wait, why? Wait, what, why are you coming on live with this video? Why do you have a bag over your head right now? Keith? What do you mean? Like, why do you have a bag?
Keith Bailey:
I learned this. I learned this during the pandemic. This is how you can show up to virtual meetings with your camera off. It’s like showing up to an in-person meeting with a bag over your head. You know, I can do things under here that you can’t see that I’m doing.
Jenn DeWall:
Yup. You can feed yourself. You could probably be sleeping. I mean, with you, Mr. Bailey, we’ve got to start showing up more on our camera. I get that zoom fatigue is a real thing. But think about the reality of it. Would you go to a meeting in a conference room with a bag over your head? Like, what is Mr. Bailey doing right now?
Keith Bailey:
The answer is absolutely not, Jenn. Absolutely not. Yeah. It’s just, it’s just a little goof, to really point a lens, if you will, to the importance of when we show up virtually is to show up and to be there and to be engaged, right? I mean, just, just the fact that you can only see from here up on me, you’re already missing out on so much body language, and then we turn that camera off, and it just, it just really leaves too much up to the imagination. It’s too much for the listener to process. You’re actually better off having a phone call. So if, if you’re not going to have cameras on the resort back to the good old days and just call each other and have a conversation that way,
Jenn DeWall:
I like that. Conference your team in, don’t put everyone. If we don’t want to talk over Zoom, we get it right. Acknowledging the reality of Zoom fatigue, or WebEx fatigue, whatever that might be, that it happens. But that sometimes, cause we’re going to be talking about storytelling today that if you’re trying to influence someone and yet it looks like you’re not engaged, or it’s hard to tell if they’re engaged, which can maybe distract you from getting your message across that, pick up the phone. Yep. It’s a concept.
Keith Bailey:
And you know, not everything has to be Zoom. I think when, when, when all this funding game start with like zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom, and we’re learning now that that’s not always the case. Now I’ve had quite a few client conversations that I’ve had that are just by phone. And it’s nice to have that, that differentiation. So if you’re going to be living in this virtual realm, either have a phone call or have the agreeance to where. Hey, you don’t need to show up to this meeting and have your camera on. But if it’s, if it’s a board meeting or if it’s something where you really need to come across, and you need other people, you be able to see your audience, perhaps the social graces on that is, Hey, we all agree that we’ll all have our cameras on. Yeah.
Jenn DeWall:
I love that. I think it’s important, especially for people that may be, let’s think of what, even the people on the team. And I know we’re going to get into storytelling, but maybe people that aren’t even as comfortable talking in public or speaking up in a meeting, that sometimes having your camera off can be a little bit intimidating. It might make them think that they don’t really care what you have to say or that they’re not really paying attention. And so that can even add more pressure when you’re trying to communicate. So Keith, I, you know, I love working with you. I’m so excited to have you here on the show. You are a Chief Story Enabler. What does that mean? How did you come to be? You have your company, Articulated Intelligence. Tell us about yourself and what your organization does.
What is a Chief Story Enabler?
Keith Bailey:
Yeah, yeah. The whole Chief Story Enabler title— it came about because a lot of clients that we work with when we start talking about storytelling, like, oh, I’ve got no great stories to tell, nothing exciting has ever happened to me. And then, once we take them through our proprietary gamified approach of tapping into your bottomless story-well of experiences and memories, the stories that come forth, people were like, oh my God, I do have a story to tell. And the answer is, yeah, if you’ve lived life, you’ve had experiences. The difference between a storyteller and a non-storyteller is the lens through which we look at the experience. So as a non-storyteller, it’s just a benign thing. As a storyteller, we look at that benign thing and that we’re able to shape it and craft it and add a resolution and meaning to it that gives it purpose and relevance. So when the audience, right, and let’s talk about the Shakespearian, all the world’s a stage. So if it’s an audience of one in a networking situation or like yourself, you’ve got a keynote coming up in all places of Wichita, Kansas, how we connect with that audience and how that story lands is, is absolutely critical. And how we tell that story will define whether we’re going to be memorable or not.
Becoming a Better Storyteller
Jenn DeWall:
Yes. You know, storytelling is so important. It’s funny. We have our family in town, my sister-in-law and her husband are visiting us from Spain. And one of the things that happened to come up over a dinner conversation is that she doesn’t feel like she’s a good storyteller, and she just wishes that she could tell better stories. And she started giving examples of different friends. And I know that we’re going to get into this, but a lot of people, you know, can shy away from wanting to even think about a story because they just automatically deem themselves as I can’t tell a story. And I feel like it’s the same thing as I’m not creative or I’m not innovative or innovative. And so, Keith, how did you become interested in storytelling as an art as something that you can help leaders and organizations do better?
Keith Bailey:
The pivotal moment for me was after I left corporate America, and I started down this venture, of helping people really with, with their presentation skills and with their stage skills. What started to come out of this was they would show up with all the content and all the data. They’d have all the facts and all the figures. Well, the thing with that is facts and figures- they fade. So we were always looking for a way to make the data and the content relevant and what it all was boiled down to was a story. What are the stories that help support this? And one day, I was out for a run, you know, very much like Einstein. I was out for his bike ride the day he thought of, of relativity, the theory of relativity. I was out for a run when I had the aha epiphany of like, Hey, well, what if, what if we were to just look for stories?
What if we were just to tap into people’s story-wells of experiences because we can take pretty much any story and be able to find meaning to it. It’s one of the things that we as humans do. We look at our experiences and try to attach meaning to them. And from that, our gamified approach called “With One Word” was, was created. And what we do with this is we take trigger words, and then through a guided visualization, we show you how to start looking back into your experiences. We’ll look at a very specific experience and then have you share that experience. And then we take, and we mold it, and we shape it, we attach meaning to it. That was really the aha moment for me was working with business professionals. But with regard to stories, stories are everywhere I have from, from the moment we’re born, the interactions we have and the stories that our parents tell us growing up to the fables, to the movies, to all these things that happen in our lives are always delivered to us in the form of the story. So when did I first become aware of stories? Gosh, probably when I, when I look back over my life and my childhood, I grew up in Holland, and Holland is a very enchanted place of canals and bricks and moss and all the kubouters and all the things that happen. Fairytales. That was probably my first interaction with stories as a kid.
Are You Guilty of Unintentional Audience Abuse?
Jenn DeWall:
Oh my gosh. And it’s such a, you know, I love that. It’s talking about how facts and figures fade, you know, the one thing that always stands out because you and I know each other outside of this is, and it will always stick with me if you want to know one of the lines or I would say the missions of Keith Bailey- it’s to prevent, and this is your phrase, but I love it, unintentional audience abuse. Tell me what that is because I think it’s an important thing for us to remember as we go out to think about who we’re trying to influence. What we’re communicating is that we ultimately want to prevent unintentional audience abuse. Tell us what that is from your own words. I just love that expression. And I think it’s really helpful. We want to obviously make a great experience where people, you know, hear what we’re trying to say. They connect, so on and so forth, but what does unintended audience abuse really mean?
Keith Bailey:
So the unintentional side of it is the speaker. The presenter doesn’t mean to do it. They’re not doing it with malice. It’s unintentional. And we have all been the recipients of it and guilty party. I have abused my audience. And the way audience abuse comes about is when you’re just espousing facts and figures and data your in your, on your so. And you’re never getting to the point where the most grievous ones that I’ve experienced was a presenter who, when it was their turn to speak, the PowerPoint slide came on with this beautiful image. And then the lights went dark. And suddenly I felt her sitting down next to me, and then it went to the next slide was all this information. And she started to read from the front row with her back to the audience, her entire presentation. The reason- I talked to her afterward, I’m like, why, why would you do that? She’s like, well, they need to know these things. And this is the only way that I know I can ensure that they get all the information. That makes total sense while this approach is, is right for the betterment of the audience.
What we know is that that’s not how you connect with your audience. That’s not how you win them over because they don’t remember what you say. They remember how you made them feel. And I don’t remember who imparted this statistic upon me, but it’s just stuck with me because it’s just a good litmus to move forward with. When you get done speaking, your audience will forget 50% of what you said within about the first 30 minutes. If you’re a good speaker, they’ll remember 5% of what you said one week later.
Jenn DeWall:
5%!?
Keith Bailey:
5%. That’s if you’re a good speaker. And we’ve all seen those incredible speakers, but try to go back and remember those incredible speakers. How much of a do you remember what they said? You remember how they made you feel. You remember perhaps some of the messages that they carried forth. You might even remember a story that they shared. So when we look at how we communicate, what we teach is moving away from a sense of presenting and starting to build more outward. We call facilitation, and facilitation has multiple parts to it. It has your content and your data. You need to get that part across. It has stories that you can tell that relate to your content and your data. This next part is incredibly pivotal. It has audience participation. When the audience participates in the actual experience, now they have a stake in the outcome, and the audience will do whatever they can to make sure that the outcome is a favorable one.
So now you’ve got their buy-in to it, and then you need to have the audio and the visual piece to come into it. When you bring those things into play, and you’re constantly moving between them and having this facilitation, you have a greater chance of avoiding unintentional audience abuse. Because here’s the thing, Jenn, with an audience, and if there’s one thing you walk away with today, and the next time you’re standing before an audience, and you have to present, just know this, the audience wants only one thing. They want you to succeed. They want you to be successful. They want you to win. They are your biggest champion. They are rooting for you the entire time. And the reason they do that is that they can see themselves standing where you’re standing, and it scares the hell out of them. So know that your audience is very empathetic to your mission and to your plight, into what you’re there to do.
And all they want you to do is win. So all you need to do is give them what they want. And facilitation, in my experience, is one of the best ways to deliver that level of engagement because you’re also speaking to all the different ways that people learn and retain information. And the kinesthetic part of it is critical. So knowing that they’ll all going to take away 5% and each audience member is going to remember a different 5%, what 5% are they going to remember? This is why content stories, audience participation, audio, and visuals all play into that complete mix of that facilitation. Yeah.
Networking and the Storyteller
Jenn DeWall:
Oh my gosh. And so important. I love that you give, I think even just for those that are listening, that I might be maybe a little reluctant to want to get into storytelling, or maybe you’re just nervous about public speaking because that absolutely happens. I really liked the point that you said that your audience wants you to succeed. So as a starting point, if any of you are nervous and trust, they want you to succeed because they obviously also want a return on their time investment. They want to make sure that they’re, you know, getting something out of it. They want it to be fun. They do want you to succeed. So you started an organization called Articulated Intelligence. Can you tell us a little bit about what Articulated Intelligence does?
Keith Bailey:
At Articulated Intelligence, our focus is to help business professionals live a life well-spoken. And I mentioned earlier that we believe that all the world is a stage. So we’ve created modules and training platforms that work with business professionals on those different stages. One of them that’s a really popular one for us right now is the networking stage. We’ve all been told, go out a network, build your network. It’s incredibly important. You need to network. Yet no one has ever taught us how to network, right? What is it showing up, going to the bar, getting loaded, and asking everybody what is it that they do? And just having, you know, superficial connection. No, that is not networking. RIght, that’s not a meaningful conversation.
So what we teach is we teach you how to maximize your R-O-N, your return on networking. And we build out a strategic plan. That’s really specific to the individual. You get to build out your own plan of how it is that you’re going to prepare for this networking event. What are the permissions you’re going to give yourself? Right? I, my goal is to have three meaningful conversations, and then I can leave if I so choose. We never really go about doing that. Like we’ve like the way to be here for a period of time. And I really don’t know what I’m going to accomplish. So to have the strategic part of it is great. The other thing that we teach you is through actually this methodology called “With One Word” is how to become a really good listener too. When people hit trigger words, that trigger memories for you. Because when you’re speaking, even during this podcast right now, our audience, we know that you have left this room and come back again.
Perhaps I mentioned something about Europe that made you think of something, your travels through Europe. Perhaps I mentioned something about the PowerPoint presentation, and you, too, had that experience. So in a networking event, we have these little jumping-off points. All you need to do is listen, have a jumping-off point, keep it in the back of your mind as the person is speaking. And then, once they’re done speaking, you can do one of many things. You can say, oh my God, I’m so there with you. I, too, had this experience one time, and then you bring the focus back to them. But I’m really interested in more about this point. You tell me about that. That is a strategic thing that you can do to have an engaging conversation with anyone. So networking is, is a really big platform for us. Another area that we work on is keynote presentations. But one of the big ones is the conversations you’re having with your customers. Because a huge thing that we focus on is teaching you how to put people before profession. I had a boss many, many years ago when I sold cycling apparel, spandex, everything.
And, and he, he told me, he said, he said, Keith people don’t buy from companies. They buy from other people. So don’t, don’t try to bring the company first, build the personal relationship. And then, over time, you’ll build that relationship. They’ll be able to come on board. And what I learned from that is the best relationships that I had and the best clients that I had. It took me time to build that relationship—the ones where I didn’t have that are the people who show up. Like, I want your product. I love your product. I just want to buy your product. It was oftentimes just a one and done, but if I had the relationship that was returned business, and we know from a business standpoint, it’s better to hold on to the business that you already have than to spend the money, to go and find new business
Jenn DeWall:
And see if there are already many ways that anyone can leverage the party or the gift of storytelling and communication. I liked that you talked about your ROI and the return on networking but then also using it as a connecting point with your customer. So why, why do we need to, so let’s go into it. Like, here’s why you need to listen to what we’re going to talk about today. Why do we need to be better storytellers?
Keith Bailey:
It’s in our DNA, right? It’s in our chemical makeup. We as, as a species, that’s how we process things. For the majority of the population of fine, I’m gonna apply the 80-20 rule. I know that’s not the correct statistic, but it’s just the ease of numbers. 80% of people process information best when there’s a story attached to it. 20% of the population are the engineers and the ones that are the very front brain and the neocortex, or the, just give me the data, give me the data, give me the data. But the story is still key because when we tell a story, there’s a specific part of the brain that we’re speaking from and to. And this is where science and voodoo come together, and it’s absolutely incredible. When we tell a story, we’re speaking from an area of the brain called the limbic mind, also called the mind’s eye.
It’s where all of our experiences and all of our memories, and all of our feelings are stored. There are no words here. It was just emotional feelings. When we’re telling a story from that, we’re actually reliving that moment. When you tell the story, and this is a critical component to telling good stories is when we tell the story in real-time, as opposed to back in such and such a year, I was doing this, saying the year is 2011 and cautiously, I’m crossing the street. We’ve built out the scene. The audience is right there with us. We’re moving forward through this moment in time, right along with us. And as we relive this experience, the listener is reliving the experience right along with us. And when we arrive at our conclusion, they arrive at their conclusion at the same time. So if you want to be persuasive, storytelling is one of the most powerful tools that you can use.
In fact, the people who’ve perfected this are known as con men. They’re awesome at it, which is, which is why storytelling has a little bit of a bad reputation, a little bit of a dark side, but con men- or con people- let’s be PC, or we’re the best at this because they will just get you wrapped up in the story and believing it. And then you’re making an emotional purchase, which is how we’d make most of our purchases is on an emotional level. So when we’re telling the story in real-time, the listener is listening. We’re speaking from our limbic mind, speaking to somebody’s limbic mind, and we are actually imprinting our ideas and our feelings and our thoughts into their mind. And then, when you make the jump from the limbic mind to the rational mind, the neo-cortex that elasticity comes around and makes the two connect.
The 80-20 Rule
Keith Bailey:
So now we’ve got the 80-20 rule, right? You’ve got people that are story-bound. They’ll think of the story and then think of the facts. And you get people who are fact-bound. They’ll think of the facts and relate the story on its own. You’re all going to be speaking to a small slice of your audience. And even then, what’s missing is the why. All right, the story is your why, right? We’ve all had a boss come out to us, and he’s like, Hey, I really need you. I, I washed dishes for a long time. Yeah. You, those pots aren’t clean. You need to scrub those down a little bit further. I’m like, Nah, I put them back on the line again. And then he comes back to me. He’s like, you know, when I was in your position, I was scrubbing pots and pans. And one time, I didn’t get, I didn’t get it completely clean. And there were bacteria that built up inside of it. And as a result of that, we ended up getting a foodborne illness in a restaurant that I was working at. That’s why I need you to clean the pots and pans to where they are clinically and hermetically clean. Oh! Oh, that’s why I need to do this. Okay. I’m more likely to clean the next pot and the pan to a higher degree than just being told what to do. So your story is, why do you do what you do? And if you can lead with that, right? I know we’re jumping around a little bit here. This is the joy of talking to someone with ADHD. The joy of this is like in a networking environment. When were common questions you ask or get asked is what, Jenn?
Jenn DeWall:
What do you do?
Keith Bailey:
What do you do? I’m in finance. I’m a doctor. I’m a lawyer. I’m a dentist. There’s the. I’m a plumber. There are so many of those. They’re just going to lump you in. What’s your differentiator. You’ve, you’ve missed that opportunity. So as opposed to leading, with what you do, you can lead with a belief statement, which for mine, you’ve heard Jenn say when I’m in a networking situation. And somebody says, so, Keith, what do you do? I start off with. I believe that unintentional audience abuse is preventable. And they get to people just to kind of like, cause they’re not expecting it. I’m leading with a why statement. I’m leading why it is that I do what I do. I want to prevent this thing that you’ve never heard of. Right. And then what that allows me to do from there is, is to parlay it into a story like, well, what, what does that mean? How do you do that? When did you first figure this out? All these things have additional stories to go along with them, and you have a chance to be engaging.
Avoiding Unintentional Audience Abuse
Jenn DeWall:
So what’s funny, Keith is I was doing a different, I think I was doing a podcast interview, and I quoted you, right? Like I, that Keith Bailey always has this expression, you know, that you prevent unintentional audience abuse. And this person had to write it down because it, I feel like that’s such a captivating, relatable statement that so many people are like, yeah. Oh my gosh, please, could you please do that for either my team meetings or do that for the next organizational event? I think it’s so relatable. And I like that. Yeah. It does break away from the traditional. This is what I do. This is how I do it. I don’t even like answering those questions anymore because I feel like it’s so no, one’s really listening. Right. We’re just sitting there. Cause it’s the same thing. But then you see a statement like I prevent unintentional audience abuse, and yeah. It’s absolutely like, wait, excuse me, tell me more. So yes, you’re quoted. I quote you now! Where do people get it wrong? Where do people get started telling wrong? Are you, and where, what is really the accidental audience abuse look like, or does unintentional audience abuse look like?
Keith Bailey:
In a story. Right? And in a story specifically where, where does that unintentional part happen? A good story is a short story, right? An anecdotal story. What tends to happen is people, they, they start telling it like they, I, I feel like I to go back to the beginning of time when the earth was still cooling to get people to really understand my position and where the story comes from. They don’t. What you want to do is you want to start the story as close to that moment in time where something happens. Right? If you think about the story about the presenter, right? I’m sitting in the theater, the lights go down, and she sits down next to me. The action is starting. I don’t have to give you anything. You know the viewpoint from the dove’s perspective. I just need to land it at the moment. So people who do that, someone who never gets to the point, I, the story goes on and on, and your audience is like, why are they still talking about that? What are they even talking about it?
Jenn DeWall:
That’s when people start to shut off their zoom cameras,
Keith Bailey:
Right? Like, oh, look at this pretty thing that tells me great stories. I look at social media, and social media is all about telling short stories, whether it’s in pictures, right? A picture’s worth a thousand words. In that, it’s a short story, and the Instagram post and the TikTok posts and all those that do really well tell a really good, specific, concise, and memorable story. So if your story doesn’t have one of those or all three of those elements in it, it’s likely not a good story.
Jenn DeWall:
Yeah. And I, you know, I like that. You’ve mentioned here’s your first start. Think of the story, but only start the story at the point of the action, because yes, that’s when it does border on it becoming too long, or I think then someone ends up, you know, describing, starting the story and then they describe everything up to it. And then they start with, well, a long story short, and then they get into the story of what actually matters.
The Long Story Short Storyteller
Keith Bailey:
When somebody says long story short you’re in for a long, long story. We have a great friend of ours, and everybody has tells, which is why I like playing poker. And his tell was when John would take a knee, and you’re done, that’s it. He’s going to be down there for a while, telling you the longest story that you’ve ever heard. And all you can pray for is that his knees start to hurt. So he stands up, but his knees aren’t going to hurt because John’s a plumber, and he’s comfortable in that position.
Jenn DeWall:
So yeah, people are too long with it. Maybe even what about the information that they provide. So if they tell a story that’s too long, but what about in terms of how we’re crafting the story? Where do we get it wrong?
Keith Bailey:
Trying to get too many points across. And that’s one of the things that also led me down this path to where I am now is when I started working with business professionals on their presentations. They’re like, all right, I got 10 minutes, and I need to get these six points across there. Isn’t a story in the world or an audience of the world’s gonna be able to retain all of that. Right? It means— pick what is, what is the this is where the one word came from is on these presentations. I would ask them. We need to boil this thing down to one word. What’s the one word that really encapsulates and embodies the message you’re trying to deliver. So with what it is that you’re telling, if your story has like six different meanings, that’s okay. Pick the meaning that is correct for the audience. Because what you’re delivering to lawyers is different for the meaning that what you’re going to be delivering to civil engineers or what you’re gonna be delivering to college students, right? The ones that you’re going to be chatting with. So be aware of your audience and what their needs are and tailor your stories, meaning to fit that audience because nothing is worse when you’re sitting there. Another form of unintentional audience abuse is when the story is told, and it has absolutely nothing to do with you.
Jenn DeWall:
And then I found $5. That’s what comes to mind is when people add expressions like that to try and make your story more interesting or have more excitement to it, for those that might be unfamiliar. That’s just a, maybe a sarcastic phrase that people will attach if someone is telling a story that doesn’t have maybe a point, and then they’ll try to make it interesting by making a joking comment like, and then you found $20, which adds that excitement. But yeah, we all know it’s so interesting. We all know what a bad story looks like because we feel it, right? Like that’s when you feel it where you’re either maybe disconnecting, or you’re just kind of confused as to why they’re telling that. And I know we want to, we’re going to dive into now tips to tell stories, but are better stories. But before we get into that, the one thing do want to talk about is the one-word concept that articulated intelligence did come up in share.
How Storytellers Find Their Story
Jenn DeWall:
So some of you might know, I know the director of the Denver chapter of the national speaker’s academy, and we brought in Articulated Intelligence to help our speakers with their storytelling. And I want to bring up the one word because there’s a lot of people that initially, even though they’re professional speakers, were initially like, how do I find my stories? What do I share? And the one-word concept that you and your team had developed was one of the most impactful takeaways. I think for the participants that went through academy because it made storytelling easy and it was a formula. That, and so I, I just want to give you some props for those that might be thinking that storytelling is still hard, or where do you even start that you did laid out a really great framework for how you can do that and how you’ve been, recall your own stories, just thinking and using that one word. I’m not sure what we can share on the podcast because I don’t want to take away from any proprietary information, but I just
Keith Bailey:
I have to share this. Because it’s, it’s, it’s such a fundamental tool. And if you, if you, if you embrace this. For us, it is foundational, right? One word is a foundational tool. I’m happy to share it with you because of so much of the work that we do. We come back to this foundational tool. And it’s one that allows you to tap into that bottomless story-well and a lot of the work that we do after this that I, I’m not going to share on this podcast. One, we don’t have enough time for it, but if you just embrace this tool for the next time you have to present, you’re going to find relevant stories because of what happens as well. And this is, I think this is a really important tip is that the first story that you think of may not be the right story for your audience, right?
So to be able to go back to the well again and what tends to happen sometimes with us, it’s like we stress out, and I can’t think of anything good, which is why the tenant that we preach is, first thought the best thought. It’s the way that Allen Ginsberg, the poet, explains how he came up with this poetry is like, I would just open my mind, and the first thing that popped in my head, I would write it down. And he would just go through his exercise that way. Now, granted afterward, he would go back, and he’d clean it up, and he tightened it up like it wasn’t the first draft that he would publish, but this idea first thought best thought is liberating and freeing. So when you’re sitting down in a creative state, adopt this whole first thought best thought because if you disregard the first thing that pops into your head, you’re like, Nah, I can cope with something better. It creates stress for the brain. And when stress happens in the brain, that part of the brain shuts down. It goes to fight or flight.
First Thought, Best Thought, Last Thought, Worst Thought
Jenn DeWall:
So what’s an example of like a first thought, best thought, like how, what would that look like for someone that might be like, I don’t know, what’s the first thought I have a lot of thoughts. Like, how do you just decide? Is it starting? Who’s your audience, and what is the first thought you have?
Keith Bailey:
Not even, not even, not, not at first, at first, no. In the creative process. This is, this is long before I sit down with the audience. I just want to be able to just pull some things out of my head. I just want to just come up with some stories and come up with some ideas. I’m not initially audience-centric. That is something as I’m moving further along. I have this collection of stories. Now I have now I don’t know who my audience is. I’m going to start shaping that story to bring it closer and have it really fit my audience. But to start in the very beginning with an audience in mind, because as a speaker and a presenter, we’re going to be speaking to different audiences and we can mold those stories. In the first thing that I focused on is let’s, let’s, let’s just go find some stories.
Let’s just go look back and let’s start looking at our experiences in our life, through the lens of a storyteller. That, to me is the most important skill that we can teach. Because once I’ve taught you that skill, you can pretty much take any, any event that’s happened in your life, mold it and shape it and be able to attach a meaning to it because our minds do that automatically. And the way we do that, I’ll change my background here in a second, but I want to give her credit where credit is due because the game that we’re about to play, was not my idea. “With One Word” is my idea. And there’s a, a game that comes after this one that we really focused on our proprietary process. This game came to me or this format came to me as a result of, of this book, which is absolutely brilliant.
Keith Bailey:
If you’re into reading anything, it’s called Storyworthy. It’s by Matthew Dicks, I’m going to send you a couple of links that you can put in the show notes. One of the stories that’s in the book, and I recommend getting the audiobook and because storytellers tell stories. He has on a, I think that’s on oh, he was a “Moth Grand-slammingest Champion Ever.” And it was the Director of The Moth who imparted this knowledge upon him of playing this format. So I want to give credit where credit’s due because I did not create the format I’m about to show you. The whole with one word as a, as a trigger and the guided visualization and all that stuff. That’s, that’s all this, this, this brain housing group here.
Jenn DeWall:
Okay, I’m ready. I’m ready.
Keith Bailey:
You want, you want to play? Do you want to play a quick game?
Jenn DeWall:
I do want to play a quick game. This is the first time playing a game on the podcast. So yeah, I’ll take it!
Keith Bailey:
All right. Ladies and gentlemen, let’s play a game. We’re going to play a game called First, Best, Last and Worst. And the way that this game works is a word is going to appear in this box. Actually, we’re going to give you words. I don’t have a slide that puts the word in there, but we’re going to give you a word. And what I want you to do is the only thing about your first experience with that word, way to think about your best experience with that word, your last experience with that word, and even your worst experience with that word and know this about worst experiences, what is terrible for you, is awesome for the story. Because people love, you know, they love have a good a good, terrible story that has a great ending to it.
Jenn DeWall:
This is one of our ways that we can start to craft better stories.
Keith Bailey:
And, and I’m just gonna, I’m just gonna give you a word. It’s one of our foundational words that we’d like to use because great stories come out of this, but you can put any word into this box and, and, and play this game over and over again, to start tapping into that story-well and pulling those ideas out.
Jenn DeWall:
Okay. Okay. I’m ready.
Keith Bailey:
So our word, Jenn DeWall, our word is the word teacher. Now I want you to think of your first teacher that you can think of. Think of a name. If you can, or description, just visualize it. Don’t say anything. Think of your best. Think of your last and think of your worst. Got them all? Okay. The story that you’re going to be sharing with us is going to self select after I save these next words. And as soon as it self-selects, that’s the story you’re going to focus on. Okay. A story is about a moment in time where something happens with one of those teachers. What is a moment in time where something happened between you and that teacher? Do you see it?
Jenn DeWall:
I’ve got two that come to mind. Yeah,
Keith Bailey:
Pick one. Okay. I want you to go back. You can close your eyes if you want to wait. Just put yourself back into that moment. Where are you? Who is there? What is happening leading up to this moment in time? What is the moment in time? And what does it mean to you today?
Jenn DeWall:
Yes, I’ve got, I was so reluctant to want to share the story, but I’ve got the story.
Keith Bailey:
That’s all right. That’s and so what we focus on is we focus on, on search, shape. And the critical part you’re about to do is the sharing of the story. If you’re going to become a storyteller, don’t sit down and start writing your story now because you’re becoming an author. Share the story out loud. And a first telling is a beautiful telling, right? Ladies and gentlemen, unscripted, unrehearsed, un—well slightly—prompted, Jenn’s story on “teacher”. The stage is all yours.
Jenn DeWall:
Okay. So when you gave the word of teacher and you talked about first, best, last and worst, and then with your additional prompts, I was initially going to talk about best. That was initially where I think of Mr. Van Gompel and how I even got to be interested in leadership. But the answer as you gave the prompting questions came down to I’ll leave this individual anonymous, but this was a teacher that I had when I was, I had him through high school and I didn’t necessarily care for him. I felt like this teacher maybe got a little bit too involved in student dramas, if you will. Like, it was just very awkward to have a teacher that was so engaged in maybe some of the happenings between kids.
And I’m going to just release, or I’m going to show you that I was maybe not the greatest kid, but my senior year, right before graduation, I had been good all through high school. I was a big rule follower. And then right before graduation, I decided to throw a party. And so I threw this party and, you know, and mind you, this was right before graduation. I had a few speeches lined up because I was in NHS and I had a few different scholarships that I was given because it was upon graduation, but I threw this party. It was two weekends before graduation. I threw this party and I get back to school on Monday morning and this teacher pulls me into his office and he says, like I heard from Peter that you had a party this weekend. And I was like, I did. And he’s like, do you know that I could take away all your scholarships from you right now? Just because of what you did and my smart response. Right? So this will, I’ll always remember is this teacher would often have students over to drink at his house after graduation.
Jenn DeWall:
And so then my smart response was to him, well, if you want to take away my scholarships, then you’ll probably have to stop serving kids under age, such a bad story, but I always think of it because it was this moment where I realized that like, there was a double standard between maybe how someone was showing up and what they were putting on me because you were maybe disciplining me and I get all the rights. Right. I, you know, there were all these scholarships that I definitely was justified, but on the flip side, you were trying to reprimand me when I know also that you had just had a bunch of people that were my age over in your backyard to do that. And that was so inappropriate. So I don’t even know where that story went. I cannot believe I shared this story of high school, but I always think of it because it really, really made me mad. And I was so good during high school that to be caught out and like, have someone want to pull that away from me right towards the end when they were also doing not okay things! It really got under my skin. I don’t even know if that was a story you were looking for.
Get to the Action to Be a Better Storyteller
Keith Bailey:
That’s a perfect story. That’s a perfect story. Let’s talk, let’s talk about this circus., this conversation is about storytelling right now. We have a raw, fresh example of a first time of, of a telling of a story. And my encouragement is, is after this, you need to tell this story again to whomever you have a house full of people. The stuff you shared with us leading it’s two weeks before high school and, and all that I would I’d get trashcan that I would, I would scrub that away from the story because we want to get as close to the moment in time. Right? So you can start the story off with, we also want to tell the story in real-time. So it’s Monday morning, two weeks before graduation, and I’ve just thrown the party of a lifetime. Mr. Such and such, who has been the bane of my existence, pulls me into his office. And I’m like, oh, what does this guy want? As he’s sitting across from me looking very intimidating, he says, and then you say whatever the words are, right, what’s happening here is we’ve given a moment where it’s in real-time. And now there’s a dialogue that is happening between you and another person. So we filled the stage with another person. That enriches the story, and we get to, as the listener, experience this exchange like we’re sitting in that room. Perhaps you give a little descriptor, right? It’s his office, which I swear is the janitors’ broom closet. It paints a picture of the mind’s eye, and we’re sitting in there, and he’s grilling me on this stuff. And as he’s doing this, I’m thinking to myself, what a hypocrite, what a complete hypocrite, and the words that come out of my mouth to this day, I don’t know where they came from. Because that leaned across the table, and I said this.
And that’s where you deliver it. Right? Because we know that you just had a thought while he’s berating you, and then you deliver your, your story and then you can end it there because that’s, that’s the end of it. And then turn and give your meaning to it. Right? I don’t like the double standards in people, which is why I believe that you need to be who you are and whatever, meaning you attach to it. Or like there’s so many like if you’re gonna present this for your college students, we can find what it means for college. If you’re gonna be delivering this, for business professionals, we can find what it means to business professionals. But it’s a great analogy of a story where you experience someone who was not doing what they were saying.
Storytellers Find Meaning in Any Story
Jenn DeWall:
Yes. And I love that because you’re so right. Suppose I think about the audience of even of this podcast and why I would be mortified that I share that story. But I’m just even thinking about if I use this for leaders, that basic thing I would say is you’ve got to, you know, walk the walk. Like if you’re not walking the walk, how are you ever going to anticipate or expect someone to follow in your footsteps or to listen to what you’re saying?
Keith Bailey:
Because, because your subordinates will see through you, right? You can say, so let’s talk a little about circle reference real quick. You can make that open-ended statement, which on its own is weightless has zero value in zero resonance to your audience of leaders that you’re speaking to. Like, you need to walk the walk. You need to do this. It’s like that guy telling me. Do you need to scrub the pans? Why do I need to scrub the pants? Right. You’re on board. And we’ll see straight through this. I remember when I was in high school was Monday, two weeks before graduation. I had just thrown the party of my life. Right now, you’ve given the meaning. You’re about to tell the story. You’re subordinate in this story. And you end up setting the leadership straight with your defiance. And as a result of that, that’s why you don’t ever want to do that. While your subordinates may not say anything to you, they’re thinking it right. That’s, that’s when that story. And you can make that thing really, really short and concise has such power to the meaning that you’re trying to deliver. Because you are in the circle, you’ve said it twice. This is what it means. Here’s the story. And this is why it means that.
Jenn DeWall:
Oh my gosh. So for those that are following along, this is, I love this tool, this game, if you will, because we obviously did not talk about this. I, I don’t know if I would have shared that story in the podcast, but really what, for those that are joining this via audio and listening to this, what Keith has behind him is a sign that says one word. And so the word was teacher. And then my goal was to think of my first teacher, my best teacher, my last teacher, and my worst teacher. And that that’s all it was to come to that story that all came down to a head of, you know, this example for leadership. You, you’re prompt, wasn’t, what’s a leadership story. It was think about your first teacher, your best teacher, your last teacher, your worst teacher, and derived from that was a story about leadership.
I just, I love the simplicity of this, that we did that and came with a story and obviously like, you know, I can still, I have to fine-tune it, but it’s, it’s really great that you can do that in such a short amount of time. And that’s where I think what this tool is. So it’s just helpful because people think that they don’t have stories. This is a simple tool to be able to start to find your stories. And just like you coached me through, like, we found a meaning that I didn’t ever really realize. I never planned on sharing my defining moment of being 18. This is 20 years ago. And what I would have said.
Keith Bailey:
But how likely are you to use this story now, now that you have this great meaning behind it? Like, how is it? Is that is that the next time you see this double standard happening? Right. Are you gonna use it then you can use it in a presentation?
Jenn DeWall:
Yeah. I mean, I think about it now. Like even when people, if I’m talking to people about how to work with kids like kids know I was 18, and I absolutely knew what was right and wrong. And I was also not afraid to talk about that because I was probably just the level of inappropriate in my insubordination, but because I’m a little bit more direct like that. And I think integrity is my high value, but I just love how quickly that we could deduce that. And yeah, maybe I would share that story of that person because it is still something to this day that sticks with me because I just, I couldn’t handle the fact that they were scolding me for something that they don’t follow themselves. And it’s, it’s awful to feel that someone’s reprimanding you, berating you, saying whatever, if they’re not following through it. So I just, there’s so many ways that I can think about that. So you talked about the circular reference, telling the story in real-time. So knocking out the fact that you know, I was there like here I was on Monday morning. What is Otey’s observation? That was another tip that you put in there.
Otey’s Observation – Details Make a Better Story
Keith Bailey:
David Otey! David Otey is a professional speaker. He’s a member of the national speakers association, Colorado chapter. He’s an engineer. And he speaks to storytelling for, for science and for engineering. And Otey’s observation is, is when you add a color and a number to a story, it makes those little details in that story, just that much more memorable. And, and he doesn’t know why. We’ve had conversations. I’ve done some collaborations with him and I’ve seen him put it to work and he’ll tell the story. And then later on like a long time later on, he came back to it again and said, and who can remember the color of my pants? And it was like khaki! Right? What was what was the color of my truck there? Like it was black, right? And like, he pulls these things forward.
Keith Bailey:
How many years had I been in the business? Oh, 23. Like people are able to recall these things because they stand out. So a adding a color on a number really helps with making the picture just that much more rounded can make the same thing, what we said, right. Given that location and giving an analogy, right? My teacher’s office was, I swear, he was put in the janitor’s broom closet. It paints the picture for the audience, or just able to allow, to allows them to visualize what a janitor’s broom closet looks like. And perhaps even smells like, or perhaps even tastes.
Jenn DeWall:
It was a science lab. It was a chemistry teacher. And it there were beakers everywhere. You can think of the Bunsen burners at each of the tables and yeah it smelled like formaldehyde.
Great Storytellers Embrace the Pause
Keith Bailey:
So in your story is you don’t have to say the beakers and the Bunsen burners. Cause you just, by saying it was a science lab that had this pungent formaldehyde smell that just opens up a whole window of senses and imagination that your audience, this is the gift you give to your audience by not overexplaining someone right by trying to draw out what the, everything in the room look like. It’s too much. We want to leave things to the audience’s imagination, which is why pausing is so important. If you were to tell this story is Mr. So-And-So pulls me into his office, which is the science room. Pause, let the audience fill in the room with stuff. And it had an overarching pungent smell of formaldehyde. Pause again, let the audience smell the formaldehyde, let them take in some kind of, you know, a malodorous odor and scent.
Let them experience that. So one of the biggest gifts you can give your audience, silence. Silence allows them to fill in those little tiny gaps and those little things within the story and enriches the story for them. If you just bulldoze right through the whole thing and speak like the micro-machine man, which dates me, he’s the man who could speak the fastest. So if in any language talked fast and was able to sell things, you sell a ton of microcars, but if you speak that fast, your audience is all they’re trying to do is keep up. Yeah.
Jenn DeWall:
That’s a great final closing point because I know we have to go. Embracing the pause and giving people the opportunity to place themselves in your story. With that pause, not thinking that they’re just waiting for you to get over as fast as possible, which I sometimes think when you’re a little nervous, we can feel like our audience wants, but they want you to be successful. And that’s maybe how we’ll end it here. How do people get in touch with you?
Keith Bailey:
Yeah, absolutely. You can find me on LinkedIn, Keith M J Bailey. You can find our website Articulated-Intelligence.com. And then my email is Keith@articulatedintelligence.com.
Jenn DeWall:
Thank you so much.
Keith Bailey:
Or, or you know what, or you can do, you can reach out to Jenn. She’s got my cell phone number and she’ll be able to put you in touch with me right away.
Jenn DeWall:
No, you reach out to Articulated Intelligence. I have seen your work with these speakers. I can’t tell you enough just how you made storytelling so easy. And this might sound like a commercial, but I think it’s just such an important skill that people need to know that it was so neat to watch the competence of one of our speakers, especially that took the story and went all the way to moving up in their Toastmasters competitions, all because of the story. So if you want to reach out to the team at articulated intelligence and Keith, I would recommend it heading over there. I’ve seen it work key. Thank you so much for sharing this tool with us. And I just thank you so much for being on the show. I really am grateful for you and yes, for those, please stop and think about how you can prevent unintentional audience abuse. Thank you so much, Keith!
Keith Bailey:
Thanks Jenn. Appreciate it. See you guys soon. Live life well-spoken
Jenn DeWall:
Thank you so much for listening to this episode of The Leadership Habit podcast. I hope that you had fun hearing how we can play that one word and that you are going to take that technique or reach up to Keith and his team at articulated intelligence. For those that want to connect with Keith, just as a reminder, the website is articulated-intelligence.com. They can help you with your storytelling, help you to network better, get that R-O-N. And, of course, engage your customers. If you know someone that could benefit from this podcast episode, please share it with them. And, of course, if you like this week’s episode, give us a rate and review on your favorite podcast streaming service. And finally, if you want to be a better leader or want to develop a team full of great leaders, please reach out to us at Crestcom. We would love to come into your organization or your team to help you develop your managers into leaders, leaders that show that they care and get results. Until next time.
